Posts Tagged ‘#blogboost’

A Rose and A Thorn

Until the pandemic hit us, it was quite the challenge to get our family of four to sit down together for dinner every night. Our schedules were never in sync. After-school activities typically end around 6:30-7:30 pm. Sometimes, even later. Most nights, we would fend for ourselves and then head off to do homework, answer e-mails and whatnot.

As a parent, I always felt a twinge of guilt about this. Lots of parenting articles point to regular family dinners as the answer to raising well-rounded children who succeed academically, possess high self-esteem and are at a lower risk of alcohol and drug abuse, eating disorders and teen pregnancy.

That’s a lot of pressure to put on a mother trying to make dinner.

But I tried my best, and I’m proud to say that even without our crazy schedules my kids are kind, responsible, intelligent and well-rounded. They pretty much rock.

When we do eat as a family, our tradition is to go around the table and ask everyone to give a rose and a thorn. The rose represents something good that happened that day or something that made them happy. The thorn is for anything that didn’t go well or a challenge they were facing at school or with their friends. And even when we couldn’t all sit down together to eat; I’d still ask them to give a rose and a thorn on the way to swim practice or dance class.

Now that we are under quarantine, I am making up for lost time. I’m cooking up a storm every day for family dinners and the roses and thorns are flying.

Rose – “I don’t have the coronavirus”

Thorn – “I hate online learning.”

Rose – “I get to hang out with my dog all day.”

Thorn – “I can’t hang out with my friends.”

Rose – “Thank goodness for FaceTime.”

Thorn – “May is a long time away.”

While there are a lot of thorns to talk about these days, the roses are what keep me going. I have a full bouquet when I wake up every morning and I am incredibly grateful.

A Sign of the Times

Welcome to Life Without A Manual. Aren’t we all living that way these days? This global pandemic has caused us to rearrange our lives and discover new and creative ways to work, parent, live and, most importantly, survive. It has affected everything from the most mundane of tasks to the milestones we want to celebrate–all at a safe social distance.

I have always felt that I’m living my life without a manual. The origin story of my blog name is the perfect example of this philosophy.

For instance, I have two teenagers and parenting them is a carefully woven combination of structure and chaos. While my kids are self-sufficient and can entertain themselves, we are working through a roller coaster of emotions for what I can only describe as a grieving process. They have to adjust to this new normal of online learning instead of enjoying the interaction of a classroom setting. They maintain friendships and relationships through the magic of texting, FaceTiming and social media instead of hanging out at the mall or in someone’s home. They are suffering a loss of certain freedoms they used to enjoy like driving and staying on campus. It would be nice to have a map to help guide them through these troubled times, but there is no map and no manual.

As for me, it’s been difficult to set boundaries between working from home and living here. I’ve had to set up shop at my kitchen island which is the highest traffic area in my home. There are constant distractions, and I find it difficult to ignore the dishes and the laundry. Doesn’t this give new meaning to the term work/life balance?

The only one who seems to be thrilled with this new arrangement is our dog, and she demands constant attention. But, so does my boss. It would help to have a company handbook to show us the rules of the road. But there is no handbook and no manual.

There are so many aspects of life that have changed and who knows how it will be when this is all over. While I don’t want every post this month to be about this pandemic, I also can’t ignore it. We are living a part of world history, and it should be documented – even in this small way. And if this isn’t living life without a manual, I don’t know what is.

So I’m here to support you, and let you know you aren’t alone. I’ll share my experiences with you – the good, the bad, and the anxiety. And so I know you are with me, I hope you will comment on these posts to let me know how you are and what you are doing to get by in these crazy times.

We are all in this together. This is the Ultimate Blog Challenge – 30 days, 30 posts.  Let’s do this!

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