Archive of ‘Life Without A Manual’ category

Reinventing Myself

Here I am on the first day of a new blog challenge, wondering what the heck I will write about for 30 days straight. The last time, I did the Ultimate Blog Challenge (UBC), I focused on one of my favorite topics – books and reading. By honing in on my reading life, I now know my likes and dislikes. I created good habits to get the most out of my books. I broke some bad habits and can easily identify what I want my reading life to look like going forward. In short, it was a reinvention of one of my favorite past times

This month, I’m planning to dive into a much larger and deeply personal topic – reinventing myself and what that means for the next chapter of my life and writing career. I’ve done this several times over. It isn’t an easy process, but always a worthwhile one.

The title of my blog is not just a title – for me, it’s a way of life without any sort of manual. I always do my very best. I succeed. I fail. I make mistakes. I learn from them, and I move on. This ongoing evolution began in full force in my formative years as an often bullied and woefully unpopular caterpillar in middle school and high school. Back then, I reinvented myself into a much more confident butterfly in college. So much so that some people didn’t recognize me at my high school reunion. Talk about a metamorphosis!

From there, I went from being a single young adult and budding writer to a wife, mother, and career woman. And then – before I knew it – I turned 50 this past year. It was quite a milestone in many ways. I’m learning to say yes to the things I want and no to everything else. As an inherent people-pleaser, this is no easy task. But in doing so, I am taking a pause to make more intentional decisions about what I want and where to go from here.

This seems like as good of a time as any to reflect on these things. After all, at the end of this coming school year, I will be an empty nester which comes with a host of emotions. Some of them I’m already experiencing like sadness, nostalgia, and nausea. Others will come out of left field. And all I know is that as I get older, I still find myself in situations where I don’t know what to do. The difference now is that I might be expected to know because I have all of this life experience behind me. But the truth is, I’m still learning and growing, and reinventing myself – and that’s what I’ll explore this month through my blog posts.

Care to join me? Whether you are my age or have reinvented yourself at any stage of your life, I hope you find something that resonates with you here. Please share your comments with me, and I promise to reply One of the best things about writing is sharing my stories and then listening to and learning from other people’s experiences. I hope you will share yours with me. And if you don’t have anything to say but like what you’ve read – a simple thumbs up on Facebook works just as well. It helps me tremendously to know when something I’ve written resonates with you. Writing can be lonely sometimes. Hitting “publish” and posting these posts is my attempt at being brave and expressing myself. Your support means the world to me and keeps me going.

I’d love to hear from you!

XOXO

Elisa

July Book Report

I don’t understand what happened this past month, but sadly, my reading life has been disappointing lately. And it is not because I haven’t been reading. I think I picked the wrong ones. This is a bummer for me because I enjoy summer reading more than any other season. I like beach reads and summer book lists and everything that is associated with sitting on my comfy chair with a glass of wine and a good book.

On the plus side, I will say that I’m sort of glad I finished them all and didn’t play the DNF (did not finish) card. And I learned that I must stick to my rule of DNF-ing a book that I can’t get into within the first 75 pages. If I’m not invested by chapter 5, I’m putting it back on the shelf.

There are too many good books out there and never enough time to read them.

On the bright side, I’m four books ahead of schedule on my Goodreads 2021 Reading Challenge. If I keep this pace up – 3-4 books a month – I’ll finish the year at around 30 titles. But, it isn’t the number of books that matters; it is the quality of the stories that I am reading that counts.

And, If you have read this far into my blog post, you are probably wondering what books I read. So, let’s dive in!

Whisper Network by Chandler Baker 

The basic premise of this book is that several women are working their way up the corporate ladder. At some point in their tenure, they each get involved with their boss – a married man who likes to hire younger women and manipulate them with opportunities and promotions in exchange for certain favors. Now that their boss is about to become the next CEO of the company, they don’t want to stay silent any longer. So, can they all come together to take him down once and for all? Sound like a good story, right?

I decided to listen to this book on Audible, but the narrator did not do these characters justice. I had a hard time telling them all apart and after a while, I just didn’t care. A murder mystery subplot does develop about three-quarters of the way into the book, but at that point, I’ve completely lost interest.

I had high expectations for this book mainly because the topic of sexual harassment in the workplace interests me. It also came highly recommended by Reese Witherspoon’s book club. I’ve enjoyed several of her selections in the past, so I thought this would be no different. Also, the book was advertised as a thriller and a satisfying beach read, but to me, it was neither of those things.

The Family Next Door by Sally Hepworth

“A gripping domestic page-turner…” was how this book was advertised. But unfortunately, this was another story with several female characters that the author didn’t differentiate enough for me to keep the stories straight. Basically, three women live on a suburban street where everyone knows each other’s children and business. A new neighbor moves in and because she is single, successful, and childless, the other women are intrigued. What is she doing there? Why would she move there? They were all intrigued by this woman and a little jealous. I was about to DNF this book, but an unexpected twist happened so I had to see it through to the end. I liked the ending but wished the book was more of the “page-turner it promised to be.

I picked this book for our August book club and looking forward to discussing it to see what the others thought of it. I think someone else should pick the next book though.

The People You Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry

The next book I picked up is one that appears on almost every 2021 summer reading list. It promised a story that was a modern-day “When Harry Met Sally”. I actually rather enjoyed this book, but I wouldn’t say that I’d highly recommend it.

It’s your basic – Boy meets girl. Boy is aloof. Girl is cute but can be a little annoying. Boy and girl fight and spend 10 years of their lives trying to convince themselves they don’t love each other even though (spoiler alert) they really do.

Don’t worry, I didn’t give away the ending there. It is so obvious from the get-go!

Poppy and Alex are adorable and their witty banter kept the story moving along. And yes, there was a Harry/Sally-esque theme to the story. For me, there was way too much hype around this book – a sophomore novel by Emily Henry, who wrote “Beach Read” last summer. I really liked that book, and this one was good too, but it didn’t knock my socks off. And, after being so unhappy with the first two books I read this month, I was hoping this would turn things around for me.

Ending Parkinson’s Disease: A Prescription for Action

The last book I read – “Ending Parkinson’s Disease” – was written by four esteemed doctors and experts who are affiliated with the Michael J. Fox Foundation. I’m learning a lot about the genetic research and environmental factors that are behind this disease which has affected members of my own family. It was an interesting read, and I finished most of it. I wouldn’t say it was entertaining, but it was a solid read and one I will keep on my bookshelf as a reference when I start writing my own book (whenever that is ?).

Upcoming Books

As I said, I’m not sticking with any books that I can’t get into within the first 75 pages. I have already DNF’d Broken (in the best possible way) by Jenny Lawson. I hear this book is fantastic, but because it is a book of essays about mental health issues, it doesn’t say “summer reading” to me right now. Luckily, I got it from the library and can easily access it again when I’m ready.

I keep picking up and putting down The Stationery Shop by Marjan Kamali. I’m going to give it another go because I love historical fiction novels. And if this one doesn’t work out, I have a backup that fits nicely into this genre – Eternal by Lisa Scottoline. You won’t find this book on any 2021 summer reading lists, but that’s fine with me. I love her books and her column in the Philadelphia Inquirer. She has yet to disappoint me and from what I’ve read about the book – this is the one she has always wanted to write.

I also have a nonfiction book called Everything is Figureoutable by Marie Forleo. It is a short book about approaching your goals with a productive mindset. This is something I need to tap into right now.

I’ll save room on my list for whatever my book club wants to read next. I’m hoping for something light and easy.

Regardless of what I read – Above all, I am determined to have a much better reading month in August!

The Last Word

As always, I’m happy to offer up these book reviews to you. The only thing I ask is that you do not buy these titles from a big box company and support your local independent bookshop. I don’t about you, but I’d much rather support a family business than a man who uses my money to fund his personal space travel. Just saying…

Happy Reading!

Elisa

 

Home Sweet Home

When we bought this house, I remember thinking this will make for a nice starter home. We hadn’t started our family yet, and I thought this was the perfect size house to begin our lives together. It’s a split-level home with three bedrooms on a quarter acre of land in a nice, quiet street in a pretty neighborhood. At the time, I thought we would grow into something larger and with a basement.

More than twenty years later, we have made our “starter home” our home sweet home. We put in hardwood floors, redid all the bathrooms, painted every room several times over, changed 3/4 of the garage into an office space, gutted and designed our dream kitchen. Now we are just about finished replacing our deck and patio to create a beautiful outdoor space. Each of these projects has taken a lot of time, research, money, and love.

As a bonus, we have some of the best neighbors in the world living right on our street. Some of our closest friends are a few doors down. I started a book club that is still going strong. The township is turning a nearby golf course into a beautiful new park to walk to when it is finished.

I always say that if I won the lottery, I would buy a shore house but never move into a larger house. Besides, I don’t need any more rooms to clean! And with all the work we’ve put into this place, why not enjoy it while we can!

Yesterday, I sat on my patio with a glass of Reisling and my Kindle and sunk into my new favorite reading chair and thought  – “I am living my best life right here.” So, to the lovely realtors who call and “check-in” about selling our house. Thanks, but no thanks. We are happy here and have no plans to move anytime soon.

Call us in another 20 years.

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