“You are on your phone too much.”
“You aren’t listening. Put your phone away.”
One might think these are the words of a mom fighting an uphill battle with their kids about screen time. But in my case, you would be wrong.
Recently, the tables have turned, and my kids have called me out for being on my iPhone too much. And they aren’t wrong. Even my husband has mentioned my slow response time when he needs me. I don’t have the heart to tell him sometimes that’s due to my selective hearing. 😉
Did you know the psychological term for this is nomophobia. While I’m not disagreeing with this diagnosis, I don’t think I need to seek professional help just yet.
My therapist and family may disagree.
While it is true that I am guilty of watching too many Reels, I also have a hard time unplugging, even for just a few hours. Something always sucks me back in. Let’s face it—my entire life is on the damn thing. There are so many things in life to juggle, and the nice thing about the iPhone is that so much of it can be managed at my fingertips. However, the iPhone tends to be super-glued to my hands, and I can’t shake it off no matter how hard I try. Just look at some of the things I’m doing on my phone when I’m not watching clips of cute dogs being well….cute.
I start my day playing Wordle and Connections while drinking my coffee, and then I have breakfast.
I log my meals and calculate the Weight Watchers points in the app after breakfast, lunch, and dinner.
I check the weather before going outside to walk the dog. How cold is it? Does she need her little grey fur coat, or can she go without it?
I take several photos of her wearing her fur coat in the snow and send the best ones in the family group chat.
I answer all the messages that come through.
I read Facebook posts, scroll through Instagram to see what my kids are up to, and check LinkedIn for the latest job postings.
I post and then comment on other people’s posts.
I look to see what time it is even though I have a Fitbit on my wrist. Then, I check the Fitbit app to ensure my steps are synching properly with my device.
I text.
I e-mail.
I Google.
I Venmo.
I make grocery lists.
I track my StitchFix order that was supposed to arrive two days ago.
I read the reminders for doctor’s appointments and then log in to fill out all the forms.
I check my email for the passcode to verify it is really me.
I listen to podcasts.
I look up recipes.
I write notes to myself.
I set alarms so I don’t miss any appointments.
And the list goes on and on.
The point is that I can’t just put it down and walk away. I hate being so reliant on this device. I lost the Notes app this week and nearly had a conniption fit. And then I realized I had no idea what I saved there anyway, so one less thing to check.
On the other hand, I don’t want to miss out on conversations. I want to be present and notice the world around me. Books are waiting for me to read. Carving out time to exercise is essential. My list of 24 things to do in 2024 needs to be tackled.
These are the things I know my iPhone can never deliver.
XO,
Elisa
Tamara
January 19, 2024 at 9:51 pm (10 months ago)The only thing that sounds concerning is that your own kids, who probably grew up having a smart phone, tell you to put the phone away.
Anything else? I mean, in the olden days one needed a home phone, a book-style calendar, an address book, a calculator, a typewriter, binders, oh so many binders, a photo album, a shelf full of recipe books, a vinyl record collection, a stereo equipment, and many more individual items. Today, all of these things (and activities) are in one smart phone. No wonder!!
Kebba Buckley Button
January 18, 2024 at 6:20 pm (10 months ago)Elisa, much of this sounds familiar! I do check the weather app early, as part of planning my day. Sometimes I check my bank accounts also. I have many loved ones, and I touch bases with some of them every morning. As a writer, I have my journal, quotes, and column ideas in my phone; my iPhone is set to back up Notes to the Cloud, so you may find you can pull yours back down from the Cloud. As a photographer, I have a few thousand shots in my phone. I used to use a few devices to do all this, and now– no need! My “good camera” only shot at 5 megapixels! I make better use of my time, with all these functions together in one place. Hmmm- what if you just enjoyed it?
Elisa
January 19, 2024 at 9:23 am (10 months ago)Thanks, Kebba. I agree that doing all of these things in one place could save me time. I just need to remember to put it down when my kids are home. 🙂
Danwil Reyes
January 18, 2024 at 2:54 pm (10 months ago)All I can say is that you’re not alone in spending too much time on your iPhone. My suggestion is for you to use it in moderation. 🙂
Phil Kauffman
January 18, 2024 at 11:43 am (10 months ago)You are in good company. It is the combination of the instant gratification, the technology, the voyeurism as well as the social connections. How could you not be affected by that “killer” combination?
Elisa
January 18, 2024 at 3:29 pm (10 months ago)I know, right?! Thanks for understanding. 🙂
Nadya
January 18, 2024 at 3:58 pm (10 months ago)Oy – I can relate!! And also try to find balance – Kaulike- my word of the year!!
I grew up in the 50s and 60s, and remember visiting friends of my parents who didn’t turn the TV off (or at least down) even they had visitors! My folks were appalled, as they wouldn’t dream of leaving it on – unless it was a holiday and our cousins had come to watch a game after the meal (off during the meal!)
Elisa
January 19, 2024 at 9:25 am (10 months ago)Thanks for sharing this. I guess all new technology comes with adjustment and etiquette!