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June 2023 Book Report

Summer is my favorite time of the year to read. The days are long, and the weather is perfect for sitting by the pool or on my patio engrossed in a story. I like beach reads that are page-turners, mysteries I can’t put down, juicy celebrity memoirs filled with gossip, historical fiction that exposes me to a whole new world or culture, and family dramas that serve as an escape from reality.

I consider myself a fast reader, but it’s been quite a while since I finished a book in one day. The last time that happened was when we went to Punta Cana, and I only brought three novels for a seven-day trip. What was I thinking?! I finished those books quickly because we sat on the beach all day. By Wednesday, I was desperate for a new novel and so happy when I came across a cart of wayward books other hotel guests had left behind. Crisis averted!

Lately, I’ve been spending time refamiliarizing myself with my TBR pile. I’m almost embarrassed to say that between the print books on my shelves, the novels downloaded on my Kindle, and the audiobooks on my iPhone, I own about 200 titles I haven’t read yet. Some people have a TBR pile, and that’s cute. I have a TBR TOWER (yes, all caps are necessary here because it’s a big tower) with books. I had all good intentions of reading next but never did. As I went through each title in the TOWER,  I remembered what it was that intrigued me about the book and found myself getting excited all over again to read it.

So, I’ve decided to only read the books from my TOWER for the month of July (except for any library holds that come through. I have four titles on hold right now). In no particular order, here are the books I want to read in July:

  • “The Perfect Marriage” by Jeneva Rose (Audiobook)
  • The Maid by Nita Prose (Kindle e-book and my book club’s next pick)
  • “Loyalty” by Lisa Scottoline (Hardback book because I wanted it so bad, I spent $30 on it.)
  • “The Most Likely Club” by Elyssa Friedland (Kindle e-book)
  • “Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear” by Elizabeth Gilbert – (This will be a re-read for me, which I rarely do. However, it’s been a few years since I read it, and I could use a boost in the creativity department)

But before I dive into my mini-TBR pile (yes, it’s a cute little manageable pile again). Let me tell you about the books I read in June.

Happy Place by Emily Henry

This is the IT beach read of the summer. It’s been on the New York Times bestseller list for nine weeks and is at Number Two as I write this. There was so much hype surrounding this book which can sometimes be a problem for me. Here is the setup: boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, have lots of good sex, and get engaged. Then, boy dumps girl without explanation and doesn’t tell their friends about their breakup, and they are all vacationing together somewhere in Maine – their happy place.

I hated it. But let me tell you why.

I admit that I’m not a romance reader. If romance is part of a larger story, that’s fine, but if romance is the entire story, it’s not always for me. However, I’ve enjoyed other books by this writer, so I had no problem spending one of my precious Audible credits on it. Unfortunately, I found these characters to be privileged and immature for their age (mid-thirties). The conflicts in the book could have been easily fixed if the characters had talked to each other – but I guess it wouldn’t make it a bestselling book, right? The whole plot trope of huge misunderstandings due to miscommunication and then stretching it out for 400 pages was super annoying. I wanted to reach in and strangle most of the characters because I wasn’t rooting for any of them. By the sixth hour of a seven-and-a-half-hour audiobook experience, I DNF’d the book. I couldn’t take it anymore, and I’m glad I did because I know how it ended, and that ending would have pissed me off as well. But I’m still counting this book toward my Goodreads goal because it is six hours I will never get back.

The Soulmate by Sally Hepworth

In my opinion, this is the book that should have been the IT book for the summer. A young family moves into a beautiful house that overlooks a cliff. They love everything about the house except that it is a popular location for people to come and commit suicide. Gabe, the husband, prides himself on having talked seven people from jumping, but one night he is unsuccessful, and a young woman dies.

This thriller unfolds with the perfect mix of flashbacks and present-day events told from the perspectives of both Gabe’s wife, Pippa – who wonders if her husband pushed her off that cliff – and Amanda – the woman who died. Throughout the book, marriages unravel, family secrets come to light, and lives change forever. It was the perfect beach read for me.

This author does a masterful job of toggling between the storylines of the two women and still writes a suspenseful story that kept me turning pages until late at night. Sometimes, the character development is lacking when you have a great story, but not in this book. I loved the main characters and the minor players with important roles in the book. I especially liked the children, the coffee shop owner, and the bodyguard. Highly recommend!

The Church of Baseball: The Making of Bull Durham by Ron Shelton

When I’m not reading, I’m probably watching a Phillies game on television. Baseball is in my blood, and I count baseball movies like Field of Dreams, Bull Durham, and Moneyball as some of my favorites. When I heard this author and movie director talking about his new book on a recent podcast, I immediately put it on hold at the library. Last year, I read “Off the Cliff” about the making of Thelma and Louise, which was excellent. So, it was time for me to dive into another Hollywood story.

The Church of Baseball was a fun read. Usually, my favorite parts of these books are the behind-the-scenes stories you won’t hear anywhere else. In this book, I also thoroughly enjoyed the author’s writing process and how he sold the movie. His commitment to the story and the actors was admirable, and he wasn’t willing to budge. I can’t imagine this movie without Kevin Costner, Tim Robbins, and Susan Sarandon, but movie producers and other bigwigs were skeptical about the casting choices for Nuke and Annie. In the end, Bull Durham became a classic baseball movie that is a must-watch whenever I catch it on television.

The one thing that I felt was missing from this Hollywood story was a woman’s touch. “The Church of Baseball” was told from the director’s point of view using the notes from interviews he did with the cast and crew. It was a movie made in a man’s world with Susan Sarandon basically invited to the party. “Off the Cliff: How The Making of Thelma and Louise Drove Hollywood to the Edge” discussed the groundbreaking movie from all perspectives. The actresses (including Sarandon) shared their stories and love for the film. The screenwriter and much of the crew were women trying to break into the business and earn respect from a male-dominated field. They shared their insights on the making of this movie too. And the reader comes to appreciate that this action movie with two female leads was unheard of back in the 80s and was a blockbuster. Both of these films came out around the same time and are both classics. But in my opinion, only one of these films broke the glass ceiling, which made the book and the movie that much better.

How is your summer reading going? Let me know in the comments!

XO,
Elisa

Coffee Haikus

The following haikus were inspired by real-life events. 

Coffee is a must.
This woman runs on Dunkin.
Not Starbucks, by choice.

Hot coffee winter.
Summer switch to iced coffee.
Skim milk and sugar.

Keurig maker breaks.
Forgot coffee at Costco.
I am heartbroken.

Get dressed and drive fast.
Innocent squirrel nearly hit.
Two miles for my fix.

Six in the morning.
No line at drive-thru window.
I get breakfast too.

First, I drink coffee.
Then, I am more productive.
Shit gets done at home.

With coffee, food cooks.
Clothes are washed and folded.
Dishes are done.

No coffee. No work.
Bills unpaid. Order dinner.
Life has no meaning.

Young coffee addict.
First Postum, then came Sanka.
Soon, no more decaf.

Caffeine is my friend.
Through college and new babies.
Always and forever.

The Bird Test

Have you ever heard of the personality test that determines what type of bird you most resemble? You could be an eagle (authoritative and powerful), a peacock (confident and friendly), a dove (peace-loving and kind), or an owl (logical and intelligent). The first time I took this test was during a staff retreat. The results pigeon-holed us into our bird personas, and we learned how to work with the other bird types without shitting on them.

Back then, I was one hundred percent a dove—a people-pleasing specimen that avoided confrontation at all costs and just wanted people to get along. I prioritized being liked over everything else and often gave in to other people’s wishes to keep the peace. Sometimes I did this to a fault and definitely to my detriment.

Many years ago, I worked with a volunteer who was chairing a major fundraising event. As the staff person in charge, I did most of the work. She never seemed to have the time to do the tasks she promised to do, so I did them along with my other responsibilities without complaint. I worked long hours, and at one point, my frustration became so apparent she insisted on knowing why I was upset. When I took the brave step to lay out the instances where she didn’t follow through on her work, she burst into tears in my office and then left abruptly. I felt terrible, but we both knew I was right. By being professional and honest with her, I had hoped she would understand where I was coming from and take a more active role. Instead, she told my boss and didn’t stop telling people until it reached the highest levels of the organization. After this experience, I stayed firmly in my dove-like existence for many more years to come.

I was a dove in my personal life too. When the people closest to me didn’t get along, I saw it as my job to mediate our differences. If I disagreed with my husband, parents, or in-laws, I held my ground for a short time, but ultimately, ended up apologizing because I couldn’t stand us all being mad at each other. This cycle of fighting and reconciling was my M.O. I was always the dove surrounded by the many eagles that soared above me.

Suffice it to say; I have spent years in therapy learning to be less dove-like. After so many confrontations at work and home, I was an emotional mess. I feared confrontation instead of addressing it and lived and breathed on outside approval. I was depressed and unhappy. I was trapped in a cage papered with missed opportunities to live authentically.

And as they say, I’ve come a long way, baby. On a whim (and a Google search for something to write about today 😉 ), I took the bird test again and discovered I am no longer all dove. I’m much more of a proud peacock.

Peacocks and doves have similarities. We are social birds who are loyal and kind and have a lot of empathy toward others. And we both dislike conflict. But while the dove does whatever it takes to avoid it, the peacock reframes conflict as a challenge and has the confidence to talk it out and come up with solutions. This rings so true in my career because I’ve felt the most successful when I tackle problems head-on instead of shying away from them. I’ve learned to speak up in difficult situations, listen to both sides and arrive at a good place. Sometimes I get my way, and often I don’t, but I no longer live or die by those outcomes anymore. Life is too short.

Peacocks are also enthusiastic and curious about the world. We can quickly adapt to change and adjust to a new normal. And while change is never easy, we are open-minded creatures. Other birds may see us as loud or showy, but it’s more likely that we are creative and passionate instead. As a new empty-nester (no pun intended), I think being more peacock and less dove-like suits me well. I welcome this new stage of my life and constantly search for new ways to express my authentic self. I respect and remain loyal to the eagles and try not to annoy the owls too much.

And I am constantly hugging my inner dove and telling her not to worry so much. The sky is big enough for all of us.

Have you ever taken the bird test (also known as the D.O.P.E test)? Take it and see what bird it says you are. Do you agree with the results? Do tell me in the comments!

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