On the first day of school, Jenna came downstairs dressed in an adorable maroon top and jean shorts with her Converse sneakers. It was the perfect outfit for the first day of high school. The next day, she wore another pair of jean shorts and a gray top with a tasteful cut out in the back. I remember thinking about when I was her age and wished I had her great sense of style back then. The third day, she sat at the breakfast table in a 5K t-shirt and gym shorts. I looked at her and playfully asked, “Do I need to do laundry already?” Big mistake. Huge! She rolled her eyes and told me no one else was getting dressed up and she was tired of it already. It was no big deal. This is her new favorite phrase to say when she thinks I’m overreacting to something. No big deal. She feels I make a big deal about everything when many times I’m just asking a question– or in this case–trying to be funny. So, I’ve taken her constructive criticism of my parenting style under advisement and created the Big Deal List. It is a work in progress, but this is what I have so far.

  I will try to keep this list in mind and add to it as I pick my battles and navigate our relationship into the next phase. I can’t promise anything, but I will try. So help me out! What am I forgetting? What is on your list?

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I was so excited to take my family someplace where an amusement park would not be on the itinerary. I wanted beautiful scenery, a little adventure, good food, and quality time with the ones I love. Many of our friends raved about Sedona and when we made our vacation plans about a year ago we decided to follow suit. When we arrived in Sedona, I couldn’t help but feel like I stepped into the Pixar movie, Cars. Between the winding roads and red rocks in the backdrop, it was a shoo-in for Radiator Springs off of Route 66. I was waiting to find Lightening McQueen fixing the narrow road with Mater alongside him to cheer him on. Anyway, the town was quaint and lovely. We couldn’t get enough of the rock formations that surrounded us and the ever-changing weather (from sunny skies to brief but monsoon-like rain) provided …. Slide Rock

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In a recent conversation with my newly minted high school freshman, she informs me that none of her friends’ parents bug them about homework nearly as much as we do. I find that hard to believe, but I could be wrong. When I asked her to elaborate, she proceeded to run down a list of questions we typically pose to her regarding her schoolwork. It was a decent list and she wasn’t wrong. At least I know, she is listening! 🙂 I certainly don’t want to stress her out, but could this really be true? Don’t we all have (to some degree) a vested interest in our children’s schoolwork? In that spirit, I have put together this quick poll for my readers and fellow parents. I would love to know how much is too much.   Do you:

• Ask your child (children) how much homework they have that night?
• Ask your child if they have finished their homework?
• Ask your child if they need help with their homework?
• Check their math?
• Read essays to make sure it (a) makes sense and (b) is in complete and grammatically correct sentences?
• Help with school projects beyond driving them to Staples or Michael’s for supplies?
• Visit the teacher wiki-spaces or Google sites on a regular basis?

For the record, we definitely do not DO homework for our kids, but just as my parents did for us – we are involved and interested. I promised my daughter we will loosen the reins regarding her homework this year. Since our son is starting middle school, we will keep a close eye on him for now as he figures out good study habits and manages six teachers instead of one. So, it is your turn to weigh in. After all, we are in this together! So, how much is too much in the homework checking realm of the parenting world? Inquiring minds want to know. I look forward to your comments.

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