At night, I hear laughter coming from her bedroom as she cracks up over an episode of Friends. At night, I hear the pages of her textbook turning as she pours over her notes for tomorrow’s test. At night, I hear the rustle of the paper she tears out of her notebook that disturbs an otherwise quiet house. At night, I hear her Face Timing with her friends. At night, I hear her yell for me when she needs a form signed or wants to borrow my hair dryer. In less than a year, I won’t hear any of this because she will be away at college and I’ll hear none of the above coming from her bedroom.
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Teenagers Live Here
Typically, I make it a point not to clean up my teenagers’ bedrooms. If they close their doors, I leave well enough alone. I’ve tried to get them to clean up and eventually they do, but let’s just say life is too short and I like to pick my battles. However, the playroom—which was recently renamed the “man cave”—is a different story. Located in one of the more public areas of my house, by the side door and the powder room, it needs to be dealt with on a semi-regular basis. I don’t go in there too often because it reminds me that what was once a cheerful home for board games and Barbie dolls is now a dumping ground for the messy teenagers who dwell here. This past weekend, we had our annual Eagles tailgate party and the man cave needed to look presentable. With my son away in Florida for winter break, I had no choice. I didn’t know what I would find, but I was going in. Armed with an endless supply of trash bags, I began with the couch. Underneath the cushions, I found the following:
- AA batteries
- AAA batteries
- D batteries (see a pattern here?)
- Earbuds
- A black Sharpie
- Xbox games sans cases
- Random jigsaw puzzle pieces
- Numerous Ziploc bags containing crumbs from pretzels or chips
- More batteries
Once the couch was detoxed, I turned my attention to the homework desk where I found random art supplies, a calculator, a protractor, a 2016 calendar, and a 4th grade math workbook. Did I mention he is a freshman in high school? I also added to my battery collection. The desk area was not too bad actually except for a few half empty water bottles. At least, I know this space is being used as it was intended. I made my way around the room and started a new pile of items to be either washed or put away which included (but not limited to): a pair of underwear, socks, dress pants, a book of Mad Libs, one sneaker, and a pool towel. After about an hour of straightening, I was satisfied with the 3 trash bags filled to the brim and the room in much better condition than when I started. All I had to do now was vacuum and finish the job. I started with the couch and that’s where I found it. The piece de resistance. The best for last. The true sign of having teenagers in the house. Are you ready for this? An empty Domino’s pizza box wedged behind the couch. He is soooo lucky he wasn’t home when I found it.
A Year From Today
At this time of year, everyone wants to talk about their new years resolutions, but I don’t. Mainly because resolutions never really pan out for me. I set them—lose weight, read more, write every day—and then I do nothing to make it happen. I’d rather talk about what is important to me in the coming year. I’m putting it all out there into the real world (via cyberspace) for all to see. But, first want to visualize it. Allow me to take you into the future, 365 days from now to be exact. This is what I’d like my life to look like on January 2, 2020.
- A skinnier me. — I won’t say how much weight I will lose. I’d just like to be thinner than I am today. And I will fit into the clothes that are at the top of my closet which don’t fit right now. And I will come home from work to find a Stitch Fix box at my doorstep filled with new clothes that look amazing on me and are a size or two smaller than what I would order today.
- A healthier me. – I won’t say a prayer at the doctor’s office every time I have to take a test or get my blood pressure checked. Why? Because I will already know that I am doing all I can to pass with flying colors. And then I’ll head home to a well-balanced meal that I planned out ahead of time. I will also make sure that I am in the best frame of mind from a mental health standpoint, and if I’m not, I won’t wait too long to make an appointment with my therapist.
- A happier me. — Don’t get me wrong. I’m happy, but I’d like to put some things to look forward to on my 2020 calendar, like pre-planned date nights and a relaxing all girls’ weekend. I also want to come home from work every day feeling satisfied that I made a difference in a concrete and measurable way. In my current position, this isn’t always the case. And since writing has always made me happy, I will carve out time to work on my (first!) book to raise awareness about something that is close to my heart, but more on that later.
- A stronger me. — One of the hardest things I will have to do in 2019 is send my oldest off to college in the fall. For the last 18 years, I have given her roots and I will soon give her wings. I will make sure that she is safe and happy, but not in a helicopter parent kind of way. She must figure things out on her own terms, and hovering has never been my style. It won’t be easy, but I’ll send her out into the real world and be here for her when she needs me. And as a result, I know that my own world will inevitably change and I don’t even know how yet, but I hope to have the strength to embrace it.
Quite a list, right? Next up, figuring out how to make this list come true.