I double booked myself last week. I hate when that happens.

I signed up for Ladies Bingo Night, which is a fundraiser for our high school seniors. I also agreed to attend a social justice meeting at the synagogue. Fortunately, both were happening in the same building. Unfortunately, the timing was so close together that I wasn’t able to stay for the majority of the agenda.

On my way upstairs to play bingo, I felt a wave of guilt wash over me. Why did I bother going to that meeting in the first place? What must they think of me? Should I quit the committee altogether since my first impression was not a stellar one?

And then, I took a deep breath and stopped my thoughts from snowballing further. I’m passionate about the issues of the day, and I want the social justice committee to be my outlet for getting involved. They address topics such as antisemitism, gun control, voting rights, climate change and so much more. These are my people, and I’ve been searching for an opportunity to stand up and do more for the greater good.

But, our group of my friends can rarely get together anymore. All of our lives are crazy busy. We work. We run our kids around. We prepare dinner, do the laundry and make sure everything at home is running like clockwork. We deserve a break, and I was looking forward to spending time with them. So, I chose to stop feeling guilty.

Confidence isn’t knowing other people like you. It’s knowing you’ll be fine if they don’t.

For most of my life, I worried endlessly about what people thought of me. This lack of confidence in my decisions carried over from work relationships to personal and familial ones. I’m not ashamed to say that I’ve been to therapy to address this, and now consider myself a “reformed people pleaser.” As I get older, I realize that being kind to others doesn’t mean that you need to bend over backward and contort yourself into what they want from you. I must stay true to myself.

When I saw the above quote today, it reminded me to be authentic every day. Not some of the time. ALL OF THE TIME.

And yes, I will go back for another social justice meeting. I’ve already put important dates on my calendar so I can support their ongoing programs. I have lots to contribute, and if I don’t show up, who would lose out? Not them, but me. BINGO!

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I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. Writers thrive on the love and support they get from their readers. I know I do. The hardest part about writing a post for me is hitting the “publish” button. Each time I do it, I’m putting my voice and my life experiences out there for everyone to see. Sometimes it’s to make you think and other times to make you laugh, but mostly to let you know that you aren’t alone. So, it means the world to me when you comment or tell me that something I wrote was meaningful to you. I thank you for that on this 25th day of the blog challenge.

(What blog challenge, you say? Keep reading to learn more).

There is a particular group of readers who have inspired me this month. They are fellow bloggers taking part in the Ultimate Blog Challenge (UBC). For those of you that don’t know, UBC is a Facebook group of writers that are posting along with me for 31 days in January. The feedback they offer is priceless. It builds up my confidence as a writer to hear from them because I think they are all better writers than me. Not that it’s a competition. I’m just proud to be a member of this online community.

Picking a favorite blog in this group is like picking a favorite child. It’s impossible. But, if you’d like to give a little blog love to some UBC members, here are a few you can check out.

One thousand and two – This blog-written by Lily- is so much like me. I feel like if we ever met, we would have a lot to discuss. Her recent take on the topic of loneliness was so brave. It is an issue that I often think about in my own life but haven’t had the guts to share-yet. Thank you, Lily, for being so open and honest with your words.

Doggone Healthy Choices – We’ve had our dog, Chloe, for almost four years now, but I never had a dog growing up. Pamela’s blog is a fantastic resource for dog owners. I never feel like “I should have known that…” when reading her posts. She is all about helping us have healthy relationships with our dogs and taking good care of them.

Carrie Ann Trip – I learned quite a lot about the Christian faith from this blog. What strikes me is that even though I am a Jew, there are values that transcend all religions. Carrie Ann uses both scripture and real-life examples perfectly in order to illustrate her thoughts, and it has been a joy to read.

Cerebrations – Roy is a body of knowledge on a variety of topics. From tax advice to pop culture, you will surely find something here to your liking. His writing is a fantastic combination of sweet, salty and substantive. He also helps me be a better writer and find my way into the Twitter universe.

Lady In Read Writes – I love book blogs, and Vidya’s blog is always a wonderful place to find support for my book-buying habit. I never feel guilty about adding to my shelves because I know somewhere out there she is doing the same. I also had no idea what a review of a picture book would sound like. The thought process that goes into her reviews of these books are fascinating to me. Her non-book related posts also make me smile.

To the bloggers I didn’t list here, please know that I am cheering you on as well. From the business advice to the travel blogs, you have opened up new worlds to me. I am always looking forward to reading your next post.

In the words of Sylvia Path, “Everything in life is writable about if you have the outgoing guts to do it, and the imagination to improvise. The worst enemy to creativity is self-doubt.”

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My blog could really use some love. It has been almost five years since I started Life Without A Manual. I have done quite a bit of work on it, but a makeover is long overdue. From the beginning, my plan has been to grow the blog in readership so that if I ever write a book (WHEN I write a book), I’ll already have a following. My day-to-day plan is to come up with engaging blog posts that inspire people or at least let them know that the struggle is real, and they are not alone.

That’s it. That’s my whole plan. And I know, there should be more to it.

A few years ago, I was hosting another blog in GoDaddy, and the two crossed paths. As they say in Ghostbusters (the original), “Don’t cross the streams. It would be very bad.” Well, let’s just say streams were crossed, but the world didn’t come to an end. Instead, my website crashed and took months to rebuild from scratch, which cost me a pretty penny.

In a few weeks, GoDaddy will send me a renewal notice, and I will pay for another year to exist. But, to be honest, existing isn’t enough. I want a brand. I want a social media presence. I want more. And yet, I have a terrible habit of letting my blog lag for a few months and pick it up again when the mood strikes me. For 2020, I don’t want that to happen. This is why I’m joining the Blog Audit Challenge. I need a more strategic plan, which will mean a deep dive into what is working and what could be improved upon. I’m excited about this venture, and I look forward to bringing an even better blog to you!

If you have a blog and have done a recent makeover, I’d love to hear about it! Special thanks to Lady In Read Writes for posting about the Blog Audit Challenge. 

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