It is that time of year when my fellow bloggers come up with the one word that will guide them through the next 365 days. Last year, my word was coffee. (You can read the reasons why I chose this word here). I’m happy to report that I drank many cups of coffee with old friends, new acquaintances and family throughout 2015. Over those warm beverages, I was fortunate enough to have some amazing conversations with many of you. I felt a sense of connection to the wonderful people in my life and have deepened our relationships in meaningful ways. All of this has been a blessing to me and I am grateful for it. However, I’m doing a complete 180 in 2016. The word I have chosen this time may seem a little anti-social and self-serving and let’s face it – it is. But, if I want to see some of my own dreams come to fruition this year –and let’s face it, I’m not getting any younger—I have to own this word. I have to live this word. I have to embrace this word. My word is “me-time”–and yes, if I hyphenate it, it counts as one word. Here is a little backstory. I recently took a Myers-Briggs personality test and the results were simultaneously eye-opening and not at all surprising. As an ENFJ, I take great pride in serving as a leader in the community. I found it quite humorous that ENFJ’s are most likely to work for religious-oriented institutions. It actually said so in the report! I guess I can check that off my list. ENFJ’s are passionate people who like spending time with other people working in harmony and in pursuit of cooperation for the greater good. We focus on helping others achieve their potential and get great satisfaction watching them grow and succeed. My fellow ENFJ’s are Oprah Winfrey, Martin Luther King, Jr., and President Barack Obama. I am humbled to be in any category with this caliber of people. But sometimes, ENFJ’s find it incredibly hard to take time for themselves. In the entire 12 page report that I’ve read and re-read to myself, one sentence rings so true to me – “As giving and caring as the ENFJ is, they need to remember to value their own needs as well as the needs of others.” Can I get an AMEN?! Yes, I do need to value my own needs and dreams which is why “me-time” is such a fitting word for me in 2016. I will carve out the “me-time” even if the guilt that will surely arise kills me. I want time to write in my blog and become an even better writer. I need time to go to the gym, make healthier choices and have the energy to give to others as well as to myself. I wish to take the time to learn new things and hopefully make a few changes in my life that I have been putting off for way too long. So, in this new year, I may say no to coffee every once in a while or I might let go of some things that no longer suit me. Please don’t be mad. It’s not you. It’s me. I just need some quality “me-time” to figure it all out. Happy New Year!
Parenthood is hard. When the kids are young, it takes a physical toll — nursing, carrying them around, and let’s not forget the sleepless nights. I used to hate it when people said “Little kids. Little problems. Big Kids. Big problems.”
With all of the cooking, shopping and planning for the holidays, it is time for me to address the one question which plagues me every November. Am I sending out holiday cards this year? The short answer is I haven’t decided yet. Here is the longer answer: Yes, I want to send out cards because this is one of those holiday traditions that everyone–regardless of religion–partakes in. I love to wish my friends and family holiday greetings–although doing it in person would be so much better! Also, the thought of not reciprocating the dozens of cards that are delivered to my mailbox offers up the yearly dose of holiday guilt that I don’t wish to endure. I don’t want to send out cards this year because I know what is already on my to-do list and it is hard enough to fit in an oil change for the minivan, let alone a huge project such as this one. I’m just being honest here. And I can pretty much guarantee that while my family wants to send out holiday cards–the actual ordering, stuffing, sealing, address finding, labeling, stamping and mailing will be my responsibility. And the cards will sit on my kitchen table taunting me until every last one I ordered is out the door. Do I sound like a Scrooge yet? But wait, there is more… The thought of even selecting the card overwhelms me. As a politically correct, all-inclusive, never wants to hurt anyone’s feelings kind of person, do I order Christmas cards for my Christian friends and separate Hanukkah cards for my Jewish friends? Oy Vey! Do I order a generic “Happy Holidays” card and risk the war on Christmas voice mails and text messages that may result? Or do I play it safe and buy myself a lot more time by sending everyone of all faiths a Happy New Year card? As long as it comes out sometime in January – I’m good, right? And then, I need to pick a picture or two (or three) that represents every member of our immediate family in their happiest and most photogenic state. The thought of going through all of the pictures taken this past year and seeking approval of said family member gives me a headache. Can I get away with a collage of the hundreds of funny-looking selfies Jenna and Andrew took with my iPhone? It probably won’t measure up to the color-coordinated photos in front of the fireplace or on the beach that you will choose for your cards, but I might get points for originality. This is a big decision–one I obviously don’t take lightly. So, I’ll put it this way–you may or may not get a holiday card from my family this year. If you do, please know it was my pleasure to fit holiday cards onto my already bursting at the seams to do list and I send it to you with all the love in my heart. If you don’t get a card from us this year, It isn’t because I don’t love you. Really, I do. I just opted to go to Jiffy Lube instead. Let me just say to you all right now – Happy Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Kwanzaa, and a happy, healthy & prosperous 2016. Love, the Heismans 🙂